Monday, December 11, 2006

Living Ahead

Lately, I find myself nostalgic and yet eager for the future. A yearn for a time where I am at peace and without worry, a time that should be upon me in the next few days. Otherwise, I find myself wishing that it was the beginning of the semester, or better yet, the beginning of my high school experience. Every day, I consider that magnitude of approaches and decisions I would have altered. While I can only think of many minor modifications now, each one would have had a lasting effect on my personality today. No matter how futile this thinking, I find it impossible to avoid it altogether.
I find it surprising the many people as well as I crave the future and the past and rarely find themselves content with the present. Interestingly enough, the time and age we wish we had comes, and brings no happiness. Perhaps, we people are inevitably doomed to remain forever discontent with our situations. Why is this? Is this God’s way of keeping us running into his arms? Is it the devils plot to occupy our minds? Ah, an even better explanations! It’s the devils plan to keep us from being happy. Personally, I find our discontent to be a failure on our part. In these situations we fail to realize and capitalize on the grace that God has given us. This semester I spent much of my time dreading the work that I was assigned. I did not realize how grateful I should have been that I was able to struggle with these concepts or even discover new things. Rather than viewing the work as an arduous impossible effort, I could have looked at them as an opportunity to sharpen my skills. Even so, there is no reason why I could not have enjoyed that time fellowshipping with God.
Living ahead accomplishes one things, wasting time. It does allow us to appreciate the moment. For example, how many people realized the trees turned a bright red color during fall this year before wilting, or realized that almost all of the trees are bare? Better yet, how many people truly appreciate the last breathe they just took. I know that I constantly take that for granted, and yet that very moment is as precious as any other in life. A few weeks ago, I was talking to a friend who said, “Without school, I’m is not one. It’s who I am.” This student said in a fit to finish the college applications, which are all due in a little less than a month. Now understand, she has already written much of her essays and had them proofread. Even though there is much to comment on, I would like to address that he/she was defining herself by the school she will not attend for at least another 8 to 9 months. While ambition is important, this ambition interferes with living in and enjoying the moment.
I’ve heard the common comment that people work hard now so that they can have fun later. I believe that procrastination is always bad, because it’s difficult to stop procrastinating at the perfect time. Sometimes I have little appreciation for each moment, worry about the future, and thereby procrastinate. It’s important to live a balanced wholesome life, one with fun and hard work, one where God is center, and while we persevere in all endeavors. Seize each moment, make it joyful, make it precious, and harness its greatness.

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